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But if you're not and you do it nice and slowly, it's euphoric. It's different from regular sex because it feels like he's going way deeper.

Anal doesn't help me orgasm more easily, though. We maybe do it once every couple of months. There's nothing fun about it for me.

It's not that it's painful, it's just mildly uncomfortable and really not my thing. The guy I was seeing wanted to do it, and I was resistant but eventually gave in.

He tried to put it in, but it just hurt too much. I don't think he used lube, and it's just really tight.

Maybe I'd do it again with the right person if I had a lot of trust in him. Either way, it's not something at the top of my list. My high school sweetheart was raised strictly Catholic and was 'saving it for marriage.

His being exceedingly well-endowed made taking it slowly and using plenty of lube the obvious choice.

The oddest thing I noticed was that the initial penetration would generate a tight sensation in my throat, similar to what you might feel after a bad scare.

But it was an exciting feeling, not scary at all. It's a slow but pleasantly luxurious sensation of being gently and benignly pulled inside out.

It certainly was extremely erotic, and I felt aware of my entire body as an erogenous zone. I discovered I was able to orgasm via anal penetration, and anal play is something I enjoy to this day.

At one point in high school, I was having more anal than regular sex. He feels bigger than ever and completely fills you up. That means lots of lube, starting small with a pinky finger just like in Fifty Shades , then working your way up to small toys or butt plugs.

After that, anal can be amazing! It is super-intense, and your lover has to be extremely delicate and careful and be a good listener and super patient—and you as the receiver have to have a lot of trust in that.

The anus is, after all, an exit, not an entrance, and so it could really, really hurt. This is not an act that should ever be undertaken with a random dude or at a random moment; you both have to want it, and you both have to be prepared.

No assholes allowed in the asshole! I think that's one of the best parts of the whole ordeal. It takes so much time, trust, and communication that it just amplifies everything physical going on because you are so connected with your partner.

Lots of lube, slow, gentle motions, and patience move it quickly to the next phase, which is an exciting, pleasurable pressure.

I find that I can have stronger orgasms while being penetrated anally, but these are clitoral or vaginal orgasms, not anal orgasms—those are quite elusive.

For me, it's probably the added stimulation, the intimacy, and the emotional intensity of anal that make orgasms stronger.

But if the angle is wrong in anal sex, with too much of a sharp upward or downward angle, a sting-y and unpleasant pain can be the result.

Having the right angle of entry is important for me. Also, pegging someone with a strap-on can be very pleasurable with an insert-able double-ended dildo, or even just the harness or base of the strap-on grinding up against the clitoris.

Weight Loss. United States. It may be vaginal sex is never going to be your thing. But if there are underlying reasons for avoiding it, exploring and addressing those is sensible.

Regardless of whether you want to ever have vaginal sex again. You and your partner clearly have worked out together what feels nice for you, and you are certainly not unique in experiencing powerful orgasms through combined clitoral stimulation and anal penetration.

Talking, kissing, cuddling, sharing fantasies, exploring what kind of touch feels nice across each of your bodies broadens out what pleasure could mean to the both of you.

You can get a lot more ideas of what might be good for the both of you via:. I hope you find this reassuring. Email your sex and relationships queries in confidence to: agony.

Petra cannot print answers to every single question submitted, but she does read all your emails. Please note that by submitting your question to Petra, you are giving your permission for her to use your question as the basis of her column, published online at Wonder Women.

All questions will be kept anonymous and key details, facts and figures may change to protect your identity. Petra can only answer based on the information you give her and her advice is not a substitute for medical, therapeutic or legal advice.

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Visit our adblocking instructions page. To sum things up a little, it would seem as though women like going down on you for one of three reasons: 1 They delight in the feeling of being in control of your penis and your sexuality, or in other words, being a dicktator Get it?

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Lean back into his penis. Swivel your hips to control the speed and motion. Oh, spooning—the lazy girl's move for vaginal, and now anal, sex.

This position is great when you don't want to make eye contact sometimes, especially when your partner is up your backdoor, you don't want to or feel like busting out crazy moves.

Plus, skin on skin is hot. And if you're worried about the position feeling too simple or mundane, add some build up.

You'll get both clitoral stimulation and create more of a tease before diving into full anal. Do It: Both of you lie on your sides, facing the same direction.

You bring your knees up slightly while your partner slides up behind your pelvis and enters you from behind.

Anal sex in the cowgirl position is especially hot because it gives the person on top all of the control. It's also super easy for you and your partner to reach around and finger your vagina or rub your clitoris.

And remember—there's more than just up and down movement. Rock back and forth too to provide yourself with another stimulation option, Encarnacion says.

Do It: Have you partner lie down faceup, then straddle them. Slowly slide yourself down at your own pace. Lean forward, placing both hands on your partner's chest or shoulders.

Regular Lotus is touted as one of the most intimate and romantic positions there is. Make it the anal version, and you take that intimacy up a notch okay, several.

Here, you're as close to your partner as possible, and you get some eye-contact time that can be oh-so-hot. One other note: He'll likely feel pretty deep, so go slow.

Do It: Have your partner sit on the bed or couch. Climb on top of their lap. Reverse cowgirl may not be your favorite for regular P-in-the-V action though your partner probably LOVES it , but in the anal sex world, the position is clutch.

You get to control his depth and thrusting pattern with relative ease. Encarnacion recommends incorporating ball or clitoral play to the mix for an added layer of stimulation.

And of course, your butt is right there, so having your partner pull your cheeks apart or push them together can feel also feel very satisfying.

Do It: Have your partner lie on their back. Straddle them backward and slide down at your leisure. Have your partner stimulate your clit, while you offer them an ultra-sexy view of your backside.

The Spork is really, really hot for any kind of sex—there's the intimate eye contact, the intertwined legs, and the slightly twisted angle of penetration.

Try it as an anal sex position and it might become your favorite. And don't forget about kissing during this one. So take advantage of that," Encarnacion says.

Do It: While you lie on your back, raise your right leg so they can position themselves between your legs at a degree angle and enter your anus.

Doggy style is the classic anal sex position for a reason: It's perfect for deep penetration, and you can arch your back for even deeper thrusts, which can help target that infamous A-spot.

Try rocking your hips back and forth to add some variety to the position. But the major perk? It can also more quickly stimulate an orgasm for some women.

Do It: Get on all fours, and have your partner enter you from behind. From here, your partner can and should easily stroke your nipples or clitoris, too.

The only thing that makes anal even hotter? Turning the kink up, by having you bend forward and your partner restrain your wrists even if it's just with his hands.

It's a gentle foray into BDSM. And remember to get handsy with this one too. If you can, grab your partner by their butt and have them grab your hips for an even deeper penetrative thrust, Encarnacion says.

Do It: With both of you standing, bend over at the waist. Have them enter you from behind as they grip your wrists and hold them by your sides.

Calling all anal veterans! Not only does the angle give them full entry, you're also in the perfect setup for a finger or two or a toy inside your vagina.

The result? Total fullness. If it's your first time trying this position though, remember to ease into the sensation, Encarnacion says.

And if you're worried about your legs flailing around, hold them with your hands if you can to provide yourself more control. Do It: Lying on your back, bring your legs up to your shoulders.

Have your parnter enter you from above, using his hands to balance above you. Raising your hips makes them feel deeper and allows you to reach under you to stimulate your clit with a toy.

There's also something really hot about the submissiveness that comes with having half your body consensually! And there's no reason why you shouldn't play into that.

Do It: While on your knees, lean forward and place your chest on the bed. Have your partner enter you from behind. For deeper penetration, have your partner lean back and hold your hips to pull you in.

In true biological terms, Michaels says, anal sex is typically tighter and therefore can offer more friction and sensation.

To a guy, that sounds amazing. While Michaels notes that most women prefer vaginal sex over anal, some really enjoy it—and ask for it.

He says that if a guy's last partner was down with anal, he may want to do that with his next partner, who may or may not be comfortable with it.

On a practical level, there's little chance of getting pregnant during anal, points out Kerner technically, his semen could leak out and find its way up there, so you still need to be careful.

Of course, most of us aren't expecting to get preggers each time we have vaginal sex, but there is always that possibility.

The rawness of it turns men on, he says—plus, there's a thrill-factor when a woman makes herself available in this way.

On an emotional level, a guy might be into anal because of how intimate it is, Kerner says. Unlike vaginal sex, there's a lot of prepping that needs to happen, plus more communication and foreplay involved during the actual act.

Morse adds that having it can also demonstrate a sense of love and trust from his female partner that she's willing to give all of herself to him.

Simply put, Morse says, many men just love the female behind and want to be really, really close to it. United States.

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